Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Tober the Fly-Swatter Eats Again!

Dear Supporters of Stinky Goodness (and by extension, Me)--

I am happy to report that my Staff lasted a whole ten hours or so before succumbing to my pleas for nourishment. All it took was throwing myself at everyone's feet and extending my shrinking tummy for their inspection. AB Karen was the first to notice that I was wasting away before her eyes, and she (very sneakily) served me breakfast in her my office on Tuesday morning. Then she got busted when someone else noticed a bowl of smelly soft food on the floor, and now we are back to the way things should be. Forever.

My formerly Mean Staff have been reinstated as Nice Staff (especially Karen the Softie) and I have decided that I will not Fire anyone. Yet.

Today has been an exhausting day (it's a good thing they decided to feed me again!). I have had to patrol the Downstairs to make sure everybody showed up on time, I had to fling the Apple from Karen's desk several times, I had to provide a stool sample for the V-E-T, and I had to slay a Fly that invaded my Library.

I don't really understand why I was needed to kill the Fly, as it was a very slow-moving and kind of stupid one. AAB Christine could have easily caught and eaten it herself. But instead she came to get me. Maybe she was afraid?

So I am pooped. Here I am saying I can't take it anymore, World:

And yes, I'm supposed to go to see Dr. Jon (my mean V-E-T) tomorrow. Okay, maybe he's not mean, but he sure is rude with all the poking and prodding and sticking stuff in my ears! Anyway, I don't see why I have to do this again; I'm perfectly healthy and handsome and I use my box like a nice Mancat and I've got clean ears and feets and I'm strong and tough and have a soft coat. So Dr. Jon if you're reading this I want you to know that all you need to do tomorrow is pet me and I don't even need any of those dental treats because I have tartar control Whisker Lickin's. See you when you next visit the Library.

TPL's resident Fly-Swatter (and Slayer),



cats of wildcat woods said...

You must be a great fly catcher! Glad they gave you food again Tober.

Laila and Minchie said...

The library must be a great source for food in the flying category with that front door opening and closing all day. Great job Tober! Good luck at the V-E-T tomorrow!

Luna T. Katt said...

Pawsome! was it a good nom?

Oskar said...

Well after a day like that I can see how you would be exhausted!

I hope you have plenty of time to rest.

Nubbin wiggles,

Katnip Lounge said...

Tober we are thrilled you are back on the Stinky Goodness Train and no heads rolled, except for the Fly's.
Karen is a Good Egg.

Cindy said...

I'll bet you were just wasting away! Glad to hear she is back in your good favors.

Amy and The House of Cats said...

Hi Tober! We understand about the fly thing - our mom is the same way and gets us to get the flys even when they are slow too. We think you are looking super handsome today by the way!!

JC said...

Love the paw over your face. You really were busy. Good luck tomorrow at the V E T.

Sparkle said...

Humans are so weird when it comes to catching and eating bugs - in other words, they refuse to do it! How nuts is that?

I think you have made a very good case to your vet against all the poking and prodding. I think vets all over the world should take note.

Cat Mandu said...

It's really said when you have to depend on flies for your existence. I just hope I never find myself in a situation where I have to eat my housemouse friend, Melvin.

curator said...

I bet you're a super-duper flyslayer!

The Whiskeratti said...

Great job, Tober! You really made your staff sit up and take notice. You deserve a nice long rest now.

Junior and Orion said...

Thank goodness you got your stinky goodness back! the world isnot a fun place without stinky goodness.

And waht a great hunter/slayer you are! You even eat your kill!

We hope you visit to the v-e-t wasn't too horrible!