I am happy to report that my Staff lasted a whole ten hours or so before succumbing to my pleas for nourishment. All it took was throwing myself at everyone's feet and extending my shrinking tummy for their inspection. AB Karen was the first to notice that I was wasting away before her eyes, and she (very sneakily) served me breakfast in
My formerly Mean Staff have been reinstated as Nice Staff (especially Karen the Softie) and I have decided that I will not Fire anyone. Yet.
Today has been an exhausting day (it's a good thing they decided to feed me again!). I have had to patrol the Downstairs to make sure everybody showed up on time, I had to fling the Apple from Karen's desk several times, I had to provide a stool sample for the V-E-T, and I had to slay a Fly that invaded my Library.
I don't really understand why I was needed to kill the Fly, as it was a very slow-moving and kind of stupid one. AAB Christine could have easily caught and eaten it herself. But instead she came to get me. Maybe she was afraid?
So I am pooped. Here I am saying I can't take it anymore, World:
And yes, I'm supposed to go to see Dr. Jon (my mean V-E-T) tomorrow. Okay, maybe he's not mean, but he sure is rude with all the poking and prodding and sticking stuff in my ears! Anyway, I don't see why I have to do this again; I'm perfectly healthy and handsome and I use my box like a nice Mancat and I've got clean ears and feets and I'm strong and tough and have a soft coat. So Dr. Jon if you're reading this I want you to know that all you need to do tomorrow is pet me and I don't even need any of those dental treats because I have tartar control Whisker Lickin's. See you when you next visit the Library.
TPL's resident Fly-Swatter (and Slayer),