Wednesday, July 15, 2009

I do not understand Vacations.

My staff people keep taking these things called Vacations. I do not understand what they are for. Every time one of them has a Vacation coming up, they get all excited and start counting down days, and when the countdown is over they stop showing up to work. Usually, when multiple staff people are on Vacation at the same time, the Food Service around here gets pretty sketchy. (I almost experienced something called brunch for the first time last week. Assistant Boss Karen saved the day and insisted that I get my breakfast--although it didn't happen until 10:00am.)

So why do people have to take Vacations? I have heard many reasons, and none of them make any sense to me.

1. To get away. From what? I am a certified wasp-finder, so there is nothing scary chasing anyone in my Library.

2. To relax. Okay. . . what is more relaxing than cuddling with a warm, soggy, purring, handsome cat?

3. To recharge. I have already learned that library workers run on coffee and chocolate, so why don't we just have more of that?

4. To visit distant lands. I have ridden in a car before, and I don't see why anyone would ever want to do that. Everything they need is right here in Thorntown. . . especially Cat Love.

5. To visit with other people. Why don't they just have the people visit them here? They could introduce us, and I could get even more Tummy Rubbings and Treats.

6. To seek out entertainment. They work in a Library with exciting books and DVDs and internet access and me. They have all the entertainment they could wish for.

In conclusion, I believe that Vacations are absolutely Unnecessary for staff people who are lucky enough to work for a Cat (me) in beautiful Thorntown, Indiana.

As Boss, I hereby abolish Vacations at Thorntown Public Library.

Any leisure time can be spent giving me hugs and rubbing my tummy and fetching my apples from the floor. These are very fun, relaxing, and refreshing activities, and my staff will stay close so I can have my breakfast and supper on time.

I love the gravy part!
In the picture above, I am very happily having my breakfast on time. (Thank you, Becki.)

Working with me is a Vacation,

Tober

9 comments:

Laila and Minchie said...

So, Tober, when do you get your vacation? But then again living in the library is like a vacation, right?

We think your staff should take staycations instead!

♥Da fambly cat-a-blog kitties♥ said...

Tober, youz should have one of youz secretaries type up your thoughts 'bout vacationz an' put it up in da library so no one ebber furgets☺

JC said...

You tell em ...

You are a kind boss ...

No hissing or scratching even

What were they thinking ...

The Kitty Krew said...

What you say makes perfect sense to us, Tober! Tell it like it is...

Purrs and hugs,
The Kitty Krew

Aoise said...

I agree entirely. The staff have everything they need right with you. These excuses they keep offering are very feeble.

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Well said, Tober! We are aghast you almost had brunch. Do abolish these human vacations before this becomes a habit.

Amy said...

Oh Tober if I worked there I would never take a vacation - it seems like a wonderful place to be, especially with such a great kitty boss!

Junior and Orion said...

We don't understand vacation either. Our Meowm takes a couple a year. Maybe we should come stay with you next time our Meowm leaves.

Tuck said...

I feel your pain Tober! My humans just got back from a vacation. I didn't like it at all...