Friday, July 21, 2023

Everyone Blames the Cat

 No one respects cats these days.  Forget blaming it on the dog- for some reason, humans have changed their minds (as they frequently do) on dogs being the main makers of mischief and have started blaming it on the cat.  As if.  

My fellow feline friends, if you have mistakenly been given the blame by one of your human employees, rest assured that in reality, IT IS THE HUMANS FAULT. 

I recently became friends with a fellow library cat named Mr. Kitty, from Noble County Public Library.  Mr. Kitty and I bonded due to a *situation* in which his reputation was at stake.  

As it turns out, a vase full of water was mistakenly knocked into a bin full of books belonging to other libraries.  The blame was placed on none other than Mr. Kitty.  To make up for the damaged books, the staff at NCPL sent an apology note on behalf of Mr. Kitty.  

The apology 

The apology reads as follows:  
To the Circulation dept. 

The item we are returning to your library was the unfortunate victim of water damage by our library cat. 

There was a vase of flowers next to the crate of books that were ready to be checked in and he felt that the vase, flowers and water belonged in said crate. 

This was not at the hands of any patrons, we apologize.  Please bill our library, if needed.  

Thank  you,

Noble County Public Library
And the unrepentant culprit

To which I sent back a letter:  
Which reads as follows: 
Dear Mr. Kitty,

I wanted to let you know that your staff have (I believe) falsely accused you of damaging a library book.  They made up some cockamamie story about a vase of flowers and a crate of books blah blah blah whatever.  

My staff received the book and accusation letter and have decided not to bill your library.  My fear is that the replacement cost of the book would come out of your treat and/or catnip budget, which really would be criminal.  (And we don't need more banjo players running around, after all, so whoever actually soiled the book has done the world a favor.  You can let them know that.)

I hope you are having a nice summer and are not overwhelmed by an overabundance of noisy, smelly, grabby children.  They are nice in small doses, but yikes!  they are coming to my library in droves.  (I find it best to visit the youth staff in the morning, when it is quieter.)

Never apologize for your cattitude.  



The whole thing inspired Mr. Kitty to write his own blog post, which I am in full support of.  The more cats can fill the internet with our insight and wisdom, the more the world will become a better place. 

And maybe humans will finally understand that it's time to stop blaming the cat.  We all know the dog did it.  



John Bellen said...

Maybe some human shouldn't have put a container of water on the edge of a desk right above a bin of books...

John Bellen said...

I hope everything is going well with you, Chance, and that we hear from you soon.