Thursday, February 26, 2009

An apple a day. . .

I have recovered from Monday. Assistant Boss Karen did make an attempt to put a Collar on my neck on Tuesday morning, but I quickly let her know that it was a Bad Idea. Several treats later, I decided that she was forgiven, and we are all getting along just fine now. The Collar stays out of my sight, in a drawer--where it belongs.

The training of the Library Staff is coming along quite well. I've learned that I can entertain myself for hours watching them pick Apples up off of the floor. Actually, they are SO well-trained that I only need one Apple for almost an entire day of amusement.

I discovered this talent yesterday, when Karen fetched an apple from lunch and brought it to my desk. She placed it on the edge of the desk, and I carefully picked it up in my teeth and dropped it on the floor for her. She got all excited and picked it up. She seemed to enjoy the activity the first time, so I did it again.

Let me tell you--once these Humans get excited about something, they like to do it over and over and over again! Karen even set up an empty basket to catch the Apple, I think because she was tired of looking for it underneath things. After a while, I tired her out, and she washed and ate the Apple to give her energy.

Today she brought another Apple upstairs to play with. This one was very small, but it had a nice big stem for grabbing and dropping.

Here I am with Karen and her little Apple:

Karen wanted to photograph my Very Good Job of picking the Apple up and dropping it. Here is an Action Shot. Notice the little shadow under the Apple:

Here I am licking the Apple:

Here I am putting my teeth into it. It feels nice, like a Cord:

Here I am picking up the Apple by its nice sturdy stem:

Here I am about to drop the Apple. Notice also my technique of sitting on Karen's papers throughout this Training Session. This prevents Karen from becoming distracted by Other Unimportant Things.

Here is how it Ends:

I must say that I am Very Satisfied with the progress of the Staff in this latest Training. Several of them have visited to participate, and many have become proficient Fetchers. If they take too long to retrieve the Apple, I yell at them, and they quickly comply with my Wishes.

I used this Apple for several Training Sessions, and it was quite battered by the end of the day.

The Library Staff is doing so well that customers are taking note. Pastor Jim Allen watched me train Karen for a while, even though he is Allergic to cats. He seemed impressed by Karen's progress, as well as my excellent Apple-dropping skills. I hope they find a Cure for his Feline Allergy so he can visit me more.

Lovin' the Library Life,


Monday, February 23, 2009

Tober's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

It started with a Staff Meeting at 8:30. I did manage to get my breakfast served to me before everyone clustered around the table to talk about (supposedly) Very Important Things. I am still having a hard time getting the Staff to understand that they should be in their assigned places, and I did yell at them for a bit. This time I decided to join the Staff Meeting, so I walked across the shiny floor and hopped up on the table.

Hopping up on the table was A Smart Thing to Do, because everyone was within petting distance.

The Staff Meeting thing will be okay, I think. I received a massive amount of food for my patience, and as long as they keep that up, I will continue to let them Meet on Monday mornings. I think Becki brought in enough special yummy food to last me Forever. Purrs, Becki!

My Monday wasn't ruined until one of the Assistant Assistant Bosses came back from lunch. She came Upstairs with a Purple Collar with a Jingle Bell attached. She came in my office, where I was enjoying an afternoon nap, and presented the contraption for me to sniff at. I sniffed it and told her I did not like it. (I knew it was a Collar, even though she acted like it was a toy.) So what does she do? Does she say, "Oh, I'm sorry Tober. Let me get this thing out of your sight. We'll throw it away." NO. She puts it on my neck! She tells me I'm handsome! (As if I don't already know this.) I got up, and it jingled!

I ran through the Library, and it jingled! I ran under Linda White's desk, and it jingled after me! I ran under Linda Porter's desk, and it followed me there, too! I ran back to my office. . . still jingling! Finally the Assistant Assistant Boss scooped me up--but not to comfort me and remove the awful thing. No! She was giggling, and she showed me to other people, and they giggled too!

Here I am under a desk being The Unhappiest Cat in the World:

In case you haven't guessed it, the Awful Person who did this to me was Christine. Watch out for that one.

Karen hugged me and told me how grumpy I looked (she used the term "vet ears" to describe the laid-back position of my ears), but she was laughing too. She showed me to some Nice Library Customers, who I thought might take sympathy on me. You know what they did? They called me Pretty.

I wasn't Pretty, I was Mad! I'm a Boy-Cat, for crying out loud!

I was so Mad that I protested by sitting in my Toilet Box. And that Awful Person Christine took pictures of me, while everyone else stood around saying "Poor Tober" and laughing at me!

I was worried for a long time. The Library Staff people kept trying to reason with me, telling me I looked handsome (not pretty), and that they already jingle (keys), so I should jingle too. I said, "No. This thing is Stupid, and I am Mad, so take it off of me Please!" Christine and Linda said they would not take it off, and so did Karen.

Linda tried to hug and comfort me, and I wouldn't have it.

Here's the thing. As my second-in-command, my Assistant Boss Karen is very receptive to my needs. We share an office. She took me back to the office and had to look at me, and she could plainly see the misery on my scrunched-up face. She tried giving me Treats (didn't want any) and pettings (didn't want any of those, either). I was determined to Never Move Again. I would go on a Hunger Strike, and get skinny, and never purr, or meow, or go anywhere ever again.

Karen finally broke down and took off the Stupid Collar. (I knew she would.) I told her we should fire Christine, too, but apparently Christine does do some kind of work at the Library (other than find new ways to torment me).

This was my second (and hopefully last) encounter with a Collar.

Free at last,


Friday, February 20, 2009

People are strange.

Today the library staff and customers behaved very strangely.

Everyone was working just like they're supposed to (most of them in their assigned places), when suddenly everyone got up, went Downstairs, and walked outside (where it was very cold). It was weird.

Then they all started yelling and flapping their arms. Even weirder. That must have tired everyone out, because they came back inside and had cake, ice cream, and pink lemonade.

I found out later that they were celebrating some odd Human holiday called Hoodie Hoo Day. Apparently, Humans have the ability to chase winter away. I think that maybe I should be Very Nice to the Library staff and customers, since they may possess other Super-Powers that I don't know about.

They do this on February 20th every year, and I guess it works, because winter eventually goes away.

Today I tried Coffee for the first time. In case you did not know, most of my Assistant Assistant Bosses run on Coffee, kind of like how cars run on gasoline. They show up in the morning sometimes very droopy, but they perk up and run for the meeting room when one of them says, "The Coffee is ready." (The AABs who do not like Coffee seem to run on Chocolate instead.)

So I tried Coffee today, but I didn't really mean to. Assistant Boss Karen had a cup on my desk, and I was thirsty, so I took a drink. I thought it was my water cup. It should have been my water cup, since it was on my desk, right in front of me.

I don't think I like Coffee. Karen, Linda, and Christine seemed concerned that the Coffee would make me go crazy and skip my afternoon nap, but it just made me wash my face off and have a drink of water to get the bad taste out of my mouth. I licked some popcorn, washed my face some more, and took a nap.

I also had a close call with Ritchie, our new Custodian. He is a Nice Person, but he runs the Vacuum, which is this horrendous machine that they use to suck things off the floor. He was coming to my office to run the Vacuum, and I was leaving my office because I do not want to be trapped in a room with that horrible, scary, noisy thing, and we ran into each other. I didn't mean to startle him, especially since he's already (very unfortunately) Allergic to the Majestic Feline Species. I guess it's because of the awful Vacuum-running that I don't make him sneeze.

Because you have been deprived of a fantastic photo of me for over a week, I will leave you with this:

Can you see me? You might think that I am Very Brave to climb so high, but it is funny to hear the Library staff run around and say "Tober! Tober! Where are you?" when I'm up on a shelf relaxing.

Hoodie Hoo!


Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day!

I am featured on the bulletin board at the north end of the library!

See, the Youth Department staff must be very sad that I am not "allowed" to go Downstairs very often. They wish I could visit so they could rub my remarkably soft tummy.

So they have put me on a bulletin board so they can see me every time they go check the Bookdrop.

Chris and Shirley are the luckiest, because they pass my beautiful picture every time they go to their assigned office places.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine's Day. If you don't have a special Valentine, may I offer my snuggling services? They are free--although treats are much appreciated!

Purrs & snuggles,


Friday, February 13, 2009

The Tree

On Wednesday, it got very, very stormy in Thorntown. Look at what happened:

This is the view from the window of the Young Adult Room.

This tree was blowing back and forth, back and forth. . .

I thought it was going to fall on my Library. I hissed at it, and scared it so badly that it decided to fall the other way.

Protecting the library from Rotten Trees,


Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Staff Meetings.

Mondays are usually my most favorite day of the week. Although Assistant Boss Karen comes to visit me and cuddles me during the day, Sunday is always kind of lonely around here. Monday is exciting, because all of my people are back, and they make a big fuss over me. I get extra treats, I help do set-up in the morning, and extra-special (and much deserved) attention is lavished on me.

Well, this Monday was different. Apparently, there was a Staff Meeting. I did not authorize an 8:30 a.m. Staff Meeting. All of my people showed up to work early, which I thought was fabulous, until I realized that they did not come early to see me. Everyone crowded around a big table on the wood floors (which I do not like to walk on) and had a big talk. I have decided that I don't like Staff Meetings. When the staff members come in to work, they each have an assigned place where they are supposed to be. This makes them easy to find. When they clump together like that, it makes me nervous. It starts my day off wrong. In fact, since this occurred on a Monday, it started my week off wrong.

I tried to remind them that it was Monday, that they were in the wrong places, and that I was in dire need of attention, by standing on the carpet and yelling at them. The only one who cared enough to come to me was Assistant Boss Karen, and she made the mistake of assuming that I wanted to join the Meeting. She scooped me up and carried me to the table, and I promptly ran back to carpeted area and began yelling again.

I think if the Library employees have something very important to talk about, they can use the phone things (with the tasty cords) that sit on their desks. These seem to work reasonably well when they need to talk to people in other buildings, so why not use them for Staff Meetings? In this way, they can be in their assigned places when I need them. I need Karen to stay in her assigned place so that she can easily reach the Treat Drawer when I get the hungries. I need Bonnie to stay in her assigned place because she offers comforting words when one of the Mean Ones is forcing Medicine down my throat. Cathie needs to stay in her assigned place because she is Very Nice and fills my food dish. (She even warms it a bit when it's cold, and this makes her an A+ Person in my book!)

I am not a fan of Staff Meetings, but I later found out that it was a Very Important talk that they were having. On March 9, our Library will be using a new system called Evergreen Indiana. This is the system that helps the staff (and the customers) keep track of all of the books in the Library. Our customers will get new green cards beginning March 9, and there will be all sorts of neat things they can do with their online account. The people at the circulation desks have brochures that explain the changes that will take place when we get the new system. You should stop by the library and get a copy!

My foot is feeling like a normal foot now, but they keep giving me Medicine. I heard Karen and Christine saying that they had to give me ALL of the Medicine in the bottle. I wish I could dump the rest of it down the sink, but I don't have thumbs.

Fridays are now Popcorn Days at the Library. The nice American Legion Post #218 People are letting us use a popcorn popper, and we fire it up around 3:00 on Fridays! We are using the Youth Department Winter Reading Program, "Pop Open a Good Book," as an excuse to have yummy snacks on Friday afternoons.

Here I am sampling:

I love this place!


Thursday, February 5, 2009

How I am Famous

Here is the blog post that I promised to you last week.

I was Googling myself one evening. (I thought it would be an easy way to bring up my blog page, since my page is, in fact, Googlable.) I was shocked when my search results included links to other pages about Tober the Library Cat (me). I clicked the links, and here's what I found.

The first one:

It is very small, but you can see this informative and important blog posting at World Wide Whiskers. If you want to stay on my page--which you probably do--you can also click on the picture to make it bigger.

Here are the highlights.

Dewey isn’t the only library cat anymore. Meet Tober. Unlike Dewey, who was merely the subject of a book, Tober, the library cat of Thorntown, Indiana, has his own blog.
This very wise blogging person chose to include a very handsome shot of me. This happened to be posted on Christmas; I didn't ask to be famous for Christmas, but this does make it easier for me to forgive Santa for not bringing my hamster. Maybe this is what he meant by surprises!

This next blogger mentions one of my better-known (and least-loved) habits:

This is posted on a blog called Men and Cats. Apparently, I am not the only cat who likes to chew on cords. The people who comment on this post seem to think that there are many good ways to keep cats from chewing cords. Lucky for me, the staff at the Library hasn't found one yet!

Now you know how I am becoming Famous.

For those of you who have suffered sleepless nights about the state of my poor hurt foot, let me reassure you that I have been well taken care of. Assistant Assistant Boss Christine noticed that my foot was really stinky, Assistant Assistant Boss Linda noticed that my foot was really puffy, and Assistant Boss Karen called the nice people at the Thorntown Veterinary Clinic. Again. This time I had to ride in the stupid pet box. Hugging with a nice view is preferred, for future reference. The doctor discovered that I had an infected toe, and it was decided that I should take Medicine.

This Medicine is NOT a pill, but it is still not very good. Rather than take the Medicine when I want to, my staff people have decided that I need to take it once a day and first thing in the morning.

When Karen gives me the Medicine, she very kindly provides tasty food and treats, so that I may quickly get the awful taste out of my mouth. Christine didn't know this routine, so after she practically sat on me and forced a syringe in my mouth, I had to run through the Library, wipe my face, hide under Linda's desk (in case Christine wasn't done), and then proceed to my breakfast bowl. Which hadn't been filled yet.

I think Assistant Boss Karen needs to sign *certain people* up for more staff training time.

While my foot was hurting, I spent a lot of time in Karen's office helping her do a Very Very Important Library Report. The staff thinks that the report bored me, but NO! What happened was this: I was such a Very Big Help and such a Hard Worker that I passed out from exhaustion, right there on the paperwork. Just ask Karen.

My foot is feeling better though, and I ran around a lot today. I also received a Present from Helen. Helen very kindly crafted one of my previously chewed cords into a toy. Then she decided it was too big, so she needed to do something a little different with it. She took it home with her so that she could fix it for me! Now that's dedication! I think Helen should be Assistant Assistant Boss of the Month!

Now I must go back to cleaning my foot and plotting my evasive maneuvers for tomorrow morning.

Wish me luck!