Nope.

For the longest time my humans have been putting that awful Frontline stuff on me once a month like clockwork. 

Friends, that is terrible stuff!  I think I might be Allergic to it!  When I first became a Boss Cat, it didn't bother me much, but this last month it made my furs fall out, and I got all itchy so I scratched at it and made a Great Red Spot (like Jupiter's, but just a little smaller) and AB Karen said "Oh dear" and now I have something called Comfortis.  Which implies "comfort"--right?  Well.

Comfortis is a pill.  I don't do pills. 

It's a chewable pill, but it smells like yuck.  AB Karen smushed one and covered it with gravy, to which I replied, "Nope."

Then she put a whole one in a handful of treats.  I ate all of the treats, but to the pill I said "Nope."

AAB Christine got the bright idea to bring in Pill Pockets. 

See that ginormous pill?  It's bigger than the pocket!!!

She even brought in two flavors, thinking she could entice me with Salmon flavored treats.  Unfortunately (for her, the Traitor), I don't like soft treats one bit.  They get stuck in my teeths.  So I said "Nope" to that idea, too.

Now I hear whispering between AABs Christine and Britta Re: "Pilling the Cat."

Nope!

Allow me to refer you to a blog post from December 6, 2008:

We did get one thing straight: The library staff will never, ever give me pills.

Hmmmm.  Apparently I work with a lot of Liar-Liar-Pants-On-Fires.  Or at least three (3) of them.

I have a bad feeling about how this afternoon is going to go.  I'm alert and prepared for battle.

I dare you.

Wish me luck,

Tober

PS My V-E-T appointment last month was just my yearly check-up.  I have clean ears, bright eyes, and nice teeths.  I am alert and responsive.

There was talk about my *ahem* slightly-more-masculine-than-last-year weight.  I have gained one (1) pound.  I tried telling Dr. Jon it was All Muscle, but he said maybe I should have fewer treats. 

The good thing is that I have thirteen (13!!!) people to treat me, and sometimes there are miscommunications. . .

Toesday

I hope everyone is have a toe-tally awesome Thanksgiving Week!

Mine started with a V-E-T appointment.  BOO. 

Grumbly purrs,

Tober

Big Winner!

Last month my library had a "Where's Tober?" Contest going on.  It was in honor of My Finding Month.

AAB Miss Myrtle made a super bulletin board covered with lots and lots of Tobers and other (less important) things.  (I think AAB Blog Helper Facebooked the contest but forgot to blog it.  Sheesh.)  Anyhoo, here's a picture to give you an idea of what it looked like:

Visitors got to look at the bulletin board and guess--or count--how many Tobers were included on it!  The number of Tobers was written on a slip of paper and hidden in a top-secret hidey place, so top-secret that not even AAB Rotten Ritchie could find it and cheat.

The winner of the contest got a certificate, and some Temptations treats, and and a picture with me, and a bag of candy, and *ahem* mention on my World- and Internets- Famous Blog!  (That's right here, folks!) 

There were 68 Tobers on the bulletin board, and a library visitor named Darrah picked that number exactly!  She said she counted that many Tobers, which I think is an excellent display of counting skills!

Here I am hanging out with all of the good stuff that Darrah got to take home!  She very kindly left the bag of Temptations treats at the library, where they are being doled out very SLOWLY by my staff.

Today is Bored Meeting Day, so I'm preparing by taking an nice nap.  AB Karen and AAB Christine have a bad case of the sleepies, so I'm napping a little extra for both of them.

Hopefully they don't fall asleep in front of the Super-Bosses.  That would be embarrassing--especially if they start snoring.

Purrs, headbutts, and naps,

Tober

Cat & Mouse & Treats

AAB Britta is off Not Working today, so I'm keeping her mouse warm for her.

I would fire her, but it's her turn to buy the next round of Stinky Fish Flakes.  AND she's in charge of cleaning the crud out of my eyes, which helps keep me handsome for my admiring public (even if it annoys me while she's doing it). 

In other news, AAB Becki had two (2!) afternoons off last week and it was AWFUL.  I practically have to beg to get these other ingrates to feed me my supper.  At least AB Karen can take a hint.  AAB Christine just gets all excited that I'm hanging out in the office all of a sudden.  She's not quite bright enough to realize that I'm only paying attention to her in the hopes of getting my supper.  Sheesh.
Oh, and remember my special treats I received on my Finding Day, compliments of my visitors Bill and Janet Buckley?

AAB Christine left them out on AB Karen's desk--overnight--so I killed them.

The week is off to a very chilly start--I'm glad I'm an Inside Only Library Cat!

Brrrs,

Tober

PS--Tomorrow is Voting Day for American humans!  VOTE!

My Fourth Finding Day!

As most of you guessed, today is Friday was my Finding (or Gotcha) Day!  (Slow help around here.)

I have been a Found Cat for four whole years!

AB Karen made a cake for me for my Finding Day.  I misunderstood and thought the cake was for my eating, but really it was in honor of my Awesomeness.  But I didn't realize that until after I licked the corner.  That's why there's a knife sticking up--it means "Reserved For Tober Do Not Eat!"

According to all reports, it was a very good cake!  I can say that the frosting was very nice.  :)

I got lots of extra treats and tummy rubs and hugs for Finding Day.  I managed to nap for a good deal of it, so I think it was a success.

AND, just when I thought Finding Day couldn't get any better, I received an Official Visit from two foreign (not from Boone County) dignitaries!  Janet and Bill Buckley came to see me, and they brought presents!

AAB Becki carried me, fresh from my midafternoon nap, to meet my visitors:

They brought me a package of Party Mix cat treats! and a special 'nip pillow.  Check this out:

Bill works at the Mooresville Public Library with Cauli le Chat, the Feline Roving Reporter.  Remember my visit with Flat Five?  She's a busy busy reporter-Cat, and I'm sure she had lots to do in Mooresville, but she sent Bill and Janet to document my Fourth Finding Day. I could tell that Bill and Janet are great cat people, so I did them the rare honor of Standing Still and Letting Them Pet Me. 

Cauli's minions are obviously much more "with-it" when it comes to blogging about important events in a timely fashion (Help is still Wanted, folks).  You can read all about the visit on Cauli's Blog, which got updated on Saturday--while my AAB Blog Helper is frantically helping me type this at 3:19 pm three days AFTER my Finding Day! 

Check out the snazzy shirt that Bill is wearing!  (Ideas are forming, TPL staff!)

To see the Full Report from Cauli and the Minions, see Cauli's Saturday post.  While you're at it, check out her other posts, and the really cool MPL book trailers and videos, too.

Thanks to all of my blogging friends for the Finding Day wishes!

Purrs, Headbutts, and Nose-touches,

Tober

Help Wanted

WANTED: A useful, friendly, responsible human to help me post *regularly* on my World-Famous Blog.  The Successful applicant must (a) be willing to share a chair, (b) keep gum wrappers and Temptations treats in her desk drawer, (c) give good tummy rubs, and (d) pretend not to know where I am when there are more than three (3) children looking for me at once.

Seriously, it is FINDING MONTH and we haven't even had a Festival/Carpet Cleaning/Mess Week wrap-up yet!

I asked Photographer to take some pictures of my Library when it's a Big Mess.  On Festival Saturday (which, in feline time, was about four months ago) AB Karen has the library carpet cleaned.  This is a one-time-a-year thing, so my staff huffs and puffs and moans and groans and moves ALL (well, most) of the furnitures off of the carpet.  Except for things like book cases and hundred-year-old desks and stuff.

Here are a bunch of chairs To Be Cleaned:

Here is part of my Library minus Stuff:

Here is Stuff in weird places:

While all of the carpet cleaning FUN was going on in my Library (and under my supervision), my staff was busy Floating in the Thorntown Festival of the Turning Leaves Parade.

Here's some of my library staff.  We have Little Red Riding Hood (and Big Bad Woof Wolf), Edgar Allan Poe, Mother Goose, Mother Goose's sidekick, a Mad Hatter, and Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz!

The Thorntown Heritage Museum entered a Float in the Parade, too.  It features two barn quilts that are going to be on the Boone County Barn Quilt Trail someday.

AB Karen is frowning at the sunshine--but it was the only picture Photographer had that didn't show someone's backside.  I was a-ok with showing backsides (mine is on here all the time!), but ladies seem to take issue with that sort of thing.  Huh.

After all of the Floating and Book Sale-ing and Carpet Cleaning, it was time to move the furnitures back on Monday morning.  This would be everyone's most favorite day of the year to call in sick--but they don't, because the rest of the staff would know that the "sick" person is full of malarkey!

Every furniture gets polished and shined and put back in its proper place.  Here I am investigating a printer cabinet that hasn't quite made its way home yet:

The worst thing about the whole process is that it becomes very difficult for a BossCat to find a comfortable place the sit.  The desks can get downright Dangerous.  It's a good thing I'm so brave and mancatly!

There you have it!  My re-cap of Festival of the Turning Leaves/Book Sale/Carpet Cleaning/Mess Week!  If you will notice, it was very light on the "Book Sale"--that's because we had lots of super Volunteers who set up the Book Sale, watched over it during the weekend, and helped to dismantle it and box up the leftovers.  AAB Photographer and the rest of my Assistants are very thankful for our Friends of the Library and volunteers. 

That was a Huge post--I need a nap!

Oh, and do you know what TOMORROW is????

Purrs,

Tober

Critters!

Firstly, I want you to know that I have once again survived Festival of the Turning Leaves/Book Sale/Carpet Cleaning/Mess Week!  The weekend carpet cleaning team was very nice and did an excellent job, and everything was great until my staff came in on Monday all pooped and crabby.  But more about that in another post.

I promised to tell you about some non-human intruders in my last post!

The first intruder was a Turtle who was rescued by a concerned library patron.  This Turtle was crossing North Market Street in Thorntown, which is quite a chore (and dangerous) if you happen to be smallish.  Here's a picture of North Market St.  (I sent AAB Photographer out to get a picture and made her take it kind of low so you could get a Turtle's-eye View of the crossing.)

Look both ways!

So our concerned library patron brought Mr. Turtle in so my staff could admire his cuteness, then deposited him in front of the library, since that's where he seemed to be heading. 

And he decided that a library flowerbed was a pretty good place to be, until AAB Photographer started bugging him.  Lucky for him he's a Turtle, and can do this:

My next post will feature a photo of paint drying.

Our other intruder came later that day, and she was something special!  Now, normally I am the only animal allowed in the library, except for the occasional reindeer, Not-Tober cat, turtle, baby eyes-not-yet-opened raccoon, fennec fox, bullfrog, owl. . . um.  Huh.  Well, really I am usually the only animal.

Anyhow, we were visited by a seven-month old Woofie named Minuet who is an ICAN dog in training.  ICAN stands for Indiana Canine Assistant Network.  When Minuet grows up, she is going to be a working dog and help people.  This is from the ICAN site:  "ICAN trains dogs in a variety of skills that assist children, adolescents, and adults who have physical and/or developmental conditions such as autism, diabetes or mobility-related disabilities."

Isn't that awesome!?!?!  I'm so glad Minuet got to visit.  She was very well-behaved (for a seven-month-old Woofie), especially with all of the staff admiring her and (barely) resisting their urges to pet her. 

Okay--a blog post wouldn't be complete without a photo of Yours Truly.  Here is a photo of me Supervising the Monday-morning "put the library back together" ritual:

Award-Winning Floatiest Float Pictures coming in the next post!!

Preparing for another exciting Bored Meeting,

Tober

Good Grief!

I have not posted one single blog post in the whole month of September!  Wow.  AAB Blog-Not-Helper would be Fired, but she's been crying all week because it's Festival of the Turning Leaves/Book Sale/Carpet Cleaning/Mess Week!  So I kind of feel sorry for her, but not really.

My Library is getting ready to be One Big Mess.  This year's Festival of the Turning Leaves theme is "Superheroes."  My library ladies panicked when I told them that they all had to dress up in spandex and tall boots and capes, so I decided that they could be Literary Heroes instead.  I will be sure that there are plenty of pictures!

Last week we had a gas leak at the Library, and I had to be evacuated!  Kitties, I was sure that I was going to the V-E-T!  I was so mad!  AAB Britta grabbed me and took me to her car, and we sat together until we could go back inside again.  I DO NOT like leaving my Library.  I am an Inside Only Do Not Remove From This Building Cat!

Okay, now for all of the exciting pictures AAB Photographer took during September:

. . . . .

. . . . .

. . . . .

Yep.  She's ready for the AAB Ritchie withholding-of-the-cake treatment.  Let me tell you a little secret:  AAB Blog-Not-Helper and AAB Lazy Photographer are the SAME person.  Pretty sad, huh?

She has taken a few pictures, but mostly in the last week she realized what a lazy bum she's been this month. 

I was even playing hard-to-get, to punish her for her rottenness:

See me?  I thought it was a good hiding place until everybody started taking pictures.  The paparazzi are ridiculous around here!

Yesterday we had the first ever LEGO Club at the library--remember how AAB Kathy told the Library Bored all about it??  Well, 16 children and 10 grown-ups came to the program and built things with LEGOs!  Here are a few action shots:

Notice that I am nowhere near all that--there are way too many people in that space for me!  But I am super-happy that everyone had fun building!

Last night as AAB Sometimes-Photographer prepared to scamper out the door, she noticed that I was taking over a desk.  If everyperson leaves, SOMECAT has to watch the desk, right?

May I help you?

So I watch for Intruders.

Speaking of Intruders, the library had two (2!) non-human Intruders today! 

I will do my Very Very Best (but not promise, because AAB Blog-Not-Helper may make a liar of me) to tell you all about it tomorrow.

Purrs, headbutts, I-missed-yous,

Tober

FYI  This is what happens when you say "I want my picture taken!!!" and then change your mind:

Rotten Ritchie

I'm having trouble with one of my employees.  Maybe you can offer some advice as to how I should discipline him.

AAB Ritchie, who is the Library Custodian, seems to be under the (false) impression that cats shouldn't sit in chairs.  Apparently he thinks that if the cat (that's me) never sits in chairs, he will never have to clean cat furs off of them.  So when he sees me in a chair, he shakes the chair until I leave it.

Kitties, I know!  I know this is horrifying.  Hopefully your people have smelling salts (or at least canned tuna) nearby.  I held a staff meeting to determine how best to deal with this insubordination.

AB Karen suggested we discipline him by withholding cake.  In case you've never read my blog before, cake is a big deal around here.  We like to have cake of some sort to celebrate days ending in Y.  Ritchie *loves* cake.

Ritchie's next tattoo

First AAB Becki hid the cake.  This caused some distress when other staff ladies couldn't find the cake for a 4pm snack, but riots were avoided when the cake was discovered after a tortuous 90-second search.

After the cake was hidden, AAB Britta made Ritchie a special computer screen:

Imagine how terrifying this would be at 6:00 am!

Ritchie thought it was funny. 

 

So I arranged for a special "treat" for him.

 

100% Genuine Tober Furs

Do any of you have ideas on how to properly train a human?  He's a guy-human, which makes him a little harder to train, but still. . . You have no idea how awful it is to be awoken from a great nap by the whole world shaking.  This has to stop!

 

Thank goodness we have a three-day weekend coming. I will have an extra day (without AAB Rotten Ritchie) to nap uninterrupted, and maybe I'll think of a good way to discipline him.

 

Until then, I remain ready for battle.

 

Go ahead.  Make my day.

Wishing everyone lots of naps in chairs,

 

Tober



Mystery Solved

 In case you didn't know why they are called Library Bored Meetings:

One of these things is not like the other.

Still don't see it?  Let me help:

Yep.  Bored.

AAB Kathy looks super-happy in the top picture because (a) she only had to spend 10 minutes at the meeting and (b) she was sharing the news that the Thorntown Kiwanis Club decided to donate moneys to help the youth department start a new once-a-month Lego Club!

Thanks Kiwanis!

Considering instituting Library Awesome Meetings,

Tober

 

Being Rotten

AAB Britta ate some Starburst candies today and left the wrappers in her trashcan.

I LOVE Posty-notes, gum wrappers, library receipts, and sticker papers.  Well, guess what?  Starburst wrappers are a lot like sticker papers!!!

To get to the tasty wrappers, I had to be sneaky.  First I knocked over the trashcan.  Then I took a surreptitious (that's Fancy-Pants for "stealthy") glance around the office to be sure I couldn't be spotted. 

Then I did some investigating to see what treasures the trashcan might hold.

Ooooh, a wrapper!  Smells like orange flavor!

Then I paused to let that one digest a little.

Then I fished out another wrapper!  I'm so happy AAB Britta likes Starbursts!

That one would have been tasty, too, but AAB Party Pooper took it away from me.  She said ONE candy wrapper paper is enough for one day, and that my love of candy wrappers (and other papers) will make me urp.  But I still managed to make a mess. 

The aftermath:

Do you want to know a secret?  AAB Party Pooper might think she's all strict and stuff, but guess what she did with the other tasty Starburst wrapper. . . Guess!

She threw it in her little trashcan.  Hee hee!

*nom nom nom*

Tober

Footie Friday

AAB Linda has a nice red blankie on her desk. It's a nice comfortable place from which to snoopervise when all of the chairs in my office are occupied.  It's also very close to AAB Linda's Treat Drawer (which is HUGE, and only like 3% full of treats!) so I can get snacks to keep my energy up while I'm working.

But sometimes it's all too much for one Cat--even a tough, brave, mancatly one--to handle.

 So I nap.

And present my Footie.  Perfect for a Footie Friday, dontcha think?

Have great weekends, everybody!

Tober

Scheduling

Today I helped with the schedule. 

After AAB realized that she hit "SAVE" before I plopped my Mancatly Self on the keyboard, she calmed down an realized that (a) I'm super-talented, since I managed to hit "Shift" and "D" AND "S" with my bottom, all at the same time! and (b) there are actually TWO Tobers in this picture.  Do you see the second one??? 

Click to bigify the picture.

Happy Monday!

Scheduling SuperCat,

Tober

Summer Reading Finale!

Firstly, Thanks to Jan and the Funny Farmers for alerting AAB Christine that my whole blog went AWOL this morning!

Christine had a mini panic-attack, but managed to do whatever The Great Google wanted so that everything seems to be back in its proper place.  She said she would have had to go home Brokenhearted if all of my 230+ posts were really Gone Forever.  I probably would have needed a few bags of Temptations and an extra nap!

Shame on you, Google, for scaring us on Friday the 13th. 

On July 10 we had a fantastic program presented by Valerie Marsh.  Valerie is a storyteller and real live author, and she also brought bikes from Bikes 4 Kids to give away to lucky summer readers!  Thanks, Valerie, for the awesome storytelling and for the fun bike giveaways!

Valerie also has great taste in Blogs.  She said that my The Adventures of Tober, the Thorntown Library Cat is one of the best things she has ever read in her whole life.  Oh, wait.  Oh.  AAB Blog Helper said Valerie thought is was very good.  Aaahhhh, close enough!

She did make a mistake, though.  She gave the compliment to AAB Blog Helper!  Not to me!  There's a huge difference.  Here's a sample of MY writing:

In case you haven't noticed, I have a kind of food-y Library. My staff likes snacks, especially when they involve chocolate, but they also like anything that can be baked, iced, or spread on a cracker. I am fine with all of these foods being here (and I love love love that Whipped Cream stuff), but I have a problem with Produce.

As you probably know, I assault Apples frequently, even if they travel in small groups. Assistant Boss Karen hides them in drawers, but when she opens the drawer, I pick them up and throw them in a wastebasket. I also slap dried gourds around. They look like they used to be Produce before they died.

Here's a sample of AAB BH's writing:

The Thorntown Public Library will be developing a strategic plan in the coming months. As part of that process, we are gathering a sampling of community members and other representatives to provide input about the town of the Thorntown. The input will be used to create a community vision, and from that, suggestions for future service priorities for the library.

Which would YOU rather read???

Speaking of Strategic Planning--I started to sense that this planning silliness was getting in the way of the library's day-to-day activities, like feeding the Cat, petting the Cat, giving the Cat treats, admiring the Cat's handsomeness and bug-hunting prowess. . .

Why, one week we even missed Gum Wrapper Monday!

So I'm coping by Strategically placing my handsome self in the midst of all the Strategic Planning nonsense.

It seems to be working.  (So far.)

I'd better get back to my supervising duties.  Apparently a helicopter has just landed across the street from the library.  It's probably just Paparazzi coming to get shots of me doing Library Work, but I sent my Photographer to investigate.

Please Google, don't unBlog me again!

Tober

Welcoming

When my library people had their Strategic Planning meeting a few weeks ago, they talked about values.  One of the values they think is important is for the library building, and the library staff, to be Welcoming.

I think it's important to lead by example, so here I am being Welcoming:

See me???

After a while, I decided that AB Karen was doing a fine job of Welcoming everyone who came in the door, so I went back to my Office for a refreshing nap.

We also had Thunderboomers last week.  They were very impressive in their loudness, but much less impressive in the amount of rain and coolness they brought.  As always, I retreated to my safe in-between spot on the Stairs.  This allows me to be within earshot of my Upstairs AND Downstairs people.

I had visitors who tried to comfort me this time, though.

They helped distract me from the Thunderboomers, which was very nice of them.  I'm a tough, brave, mancatly mancat--but Thunderboomers really give me the willies.

So do fireworks, but since we are rainless and HOT here, there were no fireworks here this 4th of July.  I was absolutely thrilled, but I still wish it would rain so the corn and beans and vegetable gardens and lawns would perk up a little bit.

That is my Monday update!  Today is Bored Board Meeting Day, so I have to keep AB Karen on task!

Purring for Rain,

Tober

My Office Chair

Dear Readers & Blogging Friends,

You probably know that, as Boss, I have several office chairs throughout the library.  Sometimes my library staff is nice enough to share with me.

Sometimes they get all selfish and won't scootch forward, so I have to make do:

This position worked out well.  I managed to immobilize AAB Christine's mousing hand, and since she couldn't mouse around, she got exasperated and decided to pet me instead. 

So I settled in for a nice nap.

Then AB Karen came in and I abandoned Christine to whatever silliness she was engaged in before I arrived.  (Probably cleaning that trash-heap of a desk.)  I've got my priorities.

Kitties and other critters, stay safe and cool and hydrated.  It is 102 degrees today in Indiana!  Even the bean-plants look sad about the weather.

Happy to be an Inside-Only Cat,

Tober

Bribes

AAB Blog Helper has been awfully sad ever since she made me break my New Year's Resolution.  As Boss, I feel that it was important for her to make amends for being such a rotten AAB. 

The first thing she tried to do--which she claims was on purpose, but which I believe was Accidental--was to create a self-service staircase to the fish tank:

See, she and AAB Britta were stacking boxes up so that the InfoExpress Courier Man could get to them easily.  It really had nothing to do with providing me easy access to the Swimming Dinners in the tank.

If that had been they case, one of them would have opened the lid!

The second thing she did was to bring me Homegrown Fresh Catnip Flowers.  Aaaaaah, kitties. . .

I'm thinking that her apology worked.

She is forgiven.

At least until the Catnip wears off.

Missing a blog post was (almost) worth it,

Tober