My letter to Microsoft.

Dear Microsoft,

I think you need to add Tober to your Dictionary. When someone types about me, the Evil Spellchecker tries to replace my name (which is Tober) with tuber (among other things). This is what it looks like:


To clarify things, this is what Tober (that's me!) looks like:


This is a potato--an example of a tuber:


As you can see, there is absolutely no resemblance.

Now, I do realize that there is an "Add to Dictionary" button in the little Spellchecker box. The point is that I should already be in the Dictionary.

I wouldn't even have minded if the Evil Spellchecker tried to call me October, since my Finding Day is in October, for which I was named.

I have previously addressed this issue in my Blog, The Adventures of Tober, the Thorntown Library Cat, which should be required reading for your Organization. I am a Very Good Library Boss, and you can learn a lot about how to manage your Staff and get them to love you at the same time. I'm sure Mr. Gates will direct you to read about me, since he has been such a Big Library Helper.

I am considering writing a letter to the Oxford English Dictionary People as well, since they will want to include me in the next edition.

Respectfully,

Tober, Boss
Thorntown Public Library

Let's hope this does the trick.

The Evergreen cards are here! Hooray!

Hi everyone! This is a Very Special Blog Post to let all of my Wonderful Customers know that the Evergreen Indiana cards have arrived at the Thorntown Public Library.

I have inspected them, and found them to be quite Green.

Here I am sniffing one:


I had requested Catnip-scented (to go with the Green), but apparently this holds no appeal for most Library customers. These smell like plastic.

The Evergreen Cards will give our Thorntown Public Library customers the Super-Powers to visit places like Lebanon and Zionsville to check things out! To see a list of Libraries participating in Evergreen Indiana, visit my Library's website.

See you soon!

Tober

PS--My Staff is Excited about these new cards, too. Which I think is a little strange, since they see Library cards every day.

Oh what a week!

I am very, very Sorry that I haven't had time to post in the last week. It has been very busy at the Library, and the Staff has worked hard to prepare for the new Library system. They all did Training so that they can be Very Good Library Staff when we open at 2:00 on Monday.

They have asked me to relay a message to our Wonderful Customers: "Thank you for being very patient with us and for making the effort to return most of your items by this week-end. This will make the transition easier for all of us, and we can't wait to see you again when we have our new Evergreen system up and running!" Or something like that.

Monday they had a Staff Meeting which I attended. I have learned that I should be present for Staff Meetings, because when I roll over in the center of the table, anyone within reach is unable to resist my remarkably soft belly-fur.

They worked hard with this Evergreen thing. . . so hard, that at first I thought the attentions to ME were going to decline. This was not the case. I got Catnip every day. I usually don't get Catnip every day, but I think they felt Guilty because they were focused on Other Things.

Here I am loving my Catnip:


I am also learning that the library has many wonderful Sleeping Places. It has been warm here, and there are lots of things to watch out the windows as Spring comes. (I guess Hoodie-Hoo Day works, so I must be on the lookout for other Human Super-Powers.) I find that it is very Peaceful to take afternoon naps in the Adult Stacks.

Here I am hanging out in a Favorite chair by a Favorite window:


Can you see me?

On Friday I found something to Hunt in the Technology/Genealogy/Head Librarian/Cataloging Office (this office has a LOT of Staff in it). It was on Linda's desk, and I tried to rearrange things to get to it. It was very Exciting, although I never caught the thing:


Notice how very Serious my Assistant Boss Karen is in this photo. She and Cathie, Linda, and Christine were all very dedicated to the Hunt of the thing. My Staff makes an excellent Team when called into action. If the thing is still in the Library next week, we will undoubtably find it and give it a stern talking to. If I don't eat it first.

The highlight of the week was on Saturday when I was visited by a Celebrity. Big Red, a renowned Beanie Baby Bear, was driven to the Library by his Personal Assistant Judy Cox. Big Red is a World Traveler, and I was Most Excited to meet him. He is small in size but very big in Personality and Charm (kind of like me!). We had a photo session--with TWO photographers--which in my opinion is Very Big Doings.

Here I am posing with Big Red on my desk:


I even signed Big Red's autograph book and gave him the link to this blog in case he wants to keep in touch. I think I should have an autograph book, too, so I can keep track of all of the Very Important People I meet!

As you can see, it was a very fun-filled week!

Have a nice Sunday!

Tober

An apple a day. . .

I have recovered from Monday. Assistant Boss Karen did make an attempt to put a Collar on my neck on Tuesday morning, but I quickly let her know that it was a Bad Idea. Several treats later, I decided that she was forgiven, and we are all getting along just fine now. The Collar stays out of my sight, in a drawer--where it belongs.

The training of the Library Staff is coming along quite well. I've learned that I can entertain myself for hours watching them pick Apples up off of the floor. Actually, they are SO well-trained that I only need one Apple for almost an entire day of amusement.

I discovered this talent yesterday, when Karen fetched an apple from lunch and brought it to my desk. She placed it on the edge of the desk, and I carefully picked it up in my teeth and dropped it on the floor for her. She got all excited and picked it up. She seemed to enjoy the activity the first time, so I did it again.

Let me tell you--once these Humans get excited about something, they like to do it over and over and over again! Karen even set up an empty basket to catch the Apple, I think because she was tired of looking for it underneath things. After a while, I tired her out, and she washed and ate the Apple to give her energy.

Today she brought another Apple upstairs to play with. This one was very small, but it had a nice big stem for grabbing and dropping.

Here I am with Karen and her little Apple:


Karen wanted to photograph my Very Good Job of picking the Apple up and dropping it. Here is an Action Shot. Notice the little shadow under the Apple:


Here I am licking the Apple:


Here I am putting my teeth into it. It feels nice, like a Cord:


Here I am picking up the Apple by its nice sturdy stem:


Here I am about to drop the Apple. Notice also my technique of sitting on Karen's papers throughout this Training Session. This prevents Karen from becoming distracted by Other Unimportant Things.


Here is how it Ends:


I must say that I am Very Satisfied with the progress of the Staff in this latest Training. Several of them have visited to participate, and many have become proficient Fetchers. If they take too long to retrieve the Apple, I yell at them, and they quickly comply with my Wishes.

I used this Apple for several Training Sessions, and it was quite battered by the end of the day.

The Library Staff is doing so well that customers are taking note. Pastor Jim Allen watched me train Karen for a while, even though he is Allergic to cats. He seemed impressed by Karen's progress, as well as my excellent Apple-dropping skills. I hope they find a Cure for his Feline Allergy so he can visit me more.

Lovin' the Library Life,

Tober

Tober's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

It started with a Staff Meeting at 8:30. I did manage to get my breakfast served to me before everyone clustered around the table to talk about (supposedly) Very Important Things. I am still having a hard time getting the Staff to understand that they should be in their assigned places, and I did yell at them for a bit. This time I decided to join the Staff Meeting, so I walked across the shiny floor and hopped up on the table.

Hopping up on the table was A Smart Thing to Do, because everyone was within petting distance.

The Staff Meeting thing will be okay, I think. I received a massive amount of food for my patience, and as long as they keep that up, I will continue to let them Meet on Monday mornings. I think Becki brought in enough special yummy food to last me Forever. Purrs, Becki!


My Monday wasn't ruined until one of the Assistant Assistant Bosses came back from lunch. She came Upstairs with a Purple Collar with a Jingle Bell attached. She came in my office, where I was enjoying an afternoon nap, and presented the contraption for me to sniff at. I sniffed it and told her I did not like it. (I knew it was a Collar, even though she acted like it was a toy.) So what does she do? Does she say, "Oh, I'm sorry Tober. Let me get this thing out of your sight. We'll throw it away." NO. She puts it on my neck! She tells me I'm handsome! (As if I don't already know this.) I got up, and it jingled!

I ran through the Library, and it jingled! I ran under Linda White's desk, and it jingled after me! I ran under Linda Porter's desk, and it followed me there, too! I ran back to my office. . . still jingling! Finally the Assistant Assistant Boss scooped me up--but not to comfort me and remove the awful thing. No! She was giggling, and she showed me to other people, and they giggled too!

Here I am under a desk being The Unhappiest Cat in the World:


In case you haven't guessed it, the Awful Person who did this to me was Christine. Watch out for that one.

Karen hugged me and told me how grumpy I looked (she used the term "vet ears" to describe the laid-back position of my ears), but she was laughing too. She showed me to some Nice Library Customers, who I thought might take sympathy on me. You know what they did? They called me Pretty.

I wasn't Pretty, I was Mad! I'm a Boy-Cat, for crying out loud!

I was so Mad that I protested by sitting in my Toilet Box. And that Awful Person Christine took pictures of me, while everyone else stood around saying "Poor Tober" and laughing at me!


I was worried for a long time. The Library Staff people kept trying to reason with me, telling me I looked handsome (not pretty), and that they already jingle (keys), so I should jingle too. I said, "No. This thing is Stupid, and I am Mad, so take it off of me Please!" Christine and Linda said they would not take it off, and so did Karen.

Linda tried to hug and comfort me, and I wouldn't have it.

Here's the thing. As my second-in-command, my Assistant Boss Karen is very receptive to my needs. We share an office. She took me back to the office and had to look at me, and she could plainly see the misery on my scrunched-up face. She tried giving me Treats (didn't want any) and pettings (didn't want any of those, either). I was determined to Never Move Again. I would go on a Hunger Strike, and get skinny, and never purr, or meow, or go anywhere ever again.

Karen finally broke down and took off the Stupid Collar. (I knew she would.) I told her we should fire Christine, too, but apparently Christine does do some kind of work at the Library (other than find new ways to torment me).

This was my second (and hopefully last) encounter with a Collar.

Free at last,

Tober