It's that time of year again.

Today I got The Flea Stuff. Apparently it's the time of year for those nasty and vile things to come around again, so I'm forced to endure these monthly assaults. I mean, treatments.

I hate it with all of the furs on my mancatly body--even the gross ones that currently have The Flea Stuff on them.

AAB Christine (who, if you recall, I FIRED last month) did this to me. This is the Mad-face I gave her when she tried to make up with me:


She is crying in her office now.

On the brighter (but not by much) side, I found a good use for my Storm Shelter. My AAB Cathie very thoughtfully made this for me because I do NOT like thunderboomers. She thought it would be safer for me to stay in a Storm Shelter, since I usually tuck myself into the stairs during storms.


But, since I am a Cat, I have to do the opposite of what is expected. So I've never used it before. Until today:


(The "Mean Staff" refers to AAB Mean Christine, not AAB Thoughtful and Kind Cathie.) The Shelter made an excellent retreat from the awful apologies, whines, and sniffles that were emanating from my ex-AAB once she realized I've decided to Fire her again. (Maybe this time it will sink in.)

Feeling gross, but

Flea-Free is the Way to Be,

Tober

Library Security--Earning My Keep!

Saturday was a fantabulous day at the Library! I began with a nice roll on the floor, which earned me tummy rubbings and exclamations of admiration about my fuzzy yet mancatly belly.


Before we opened I decided to help a little bit with the shelving:


Then, right at closing time, I found an Intruder in the Library. My Assistant Assistant Bosses came to witness the Battle. I found a bug in the window of my Library, and I will not stand for that. Bugs do not belong in Libraries! So I jumped into the window to attack:


Christine and Chris were Very Impressed that I got into the window all by myself. I don't know why they were Impressed. I am a cat, and that is what cats do.

Anyway, I got the evil intruding bug in the corner of the window, and I was really giving him a rough time:


I was winning the fight, and had gotten him between my paws and teeth a few times when AABs Chris and Christine started getting really excited.


They started yelling about "wasps" and "stingers" and started moving furniture around. Then Chris did a really Bad Thing. She climbed up on a chair, took off her shoe, and smashed my opponent.

I was WINNING, and she took my fun away!

Apparently some ladies are afraid of things with stingers. AAB Christine confessed that she normally RUNS AWAY when she sees a stinger-bug. I will have to coach her on bug-hunting in the near future, because I obviously cannot be awake every time a stinger-bug invades my Library.

Chris, on the other hand, is Very Brave. . . even though she could have left the killing of the bug in my capable paws.

After AAB Christine smooshed her hands all over my face and nose and feet (she thought I might have been wounded in action) I received treats and tummy-rubs.

Tober, Defender of Library Windows & Staff

Tober's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

It started with a Staff Meeting at 8:30. I did manage to get my breakfast served to me before everyone clustered around the table to talk about (supposedly) Very Important Things. I am still having a hard time getting the Staff to understand that they should be in their assigned places, and I did yell at them for a bit. This time I decided to join the Staff Meeting, so I walked across the shiny floor and hopped up on the table.

Hopping up on the table was A Smart Thing to Do, because everyone was within petting distance.

The Staff Meeting thing will be okay, I think. I received a massive amount of food for my patience, and as long as they keep that up, I will continue to let them Meet on Monday mornings. I think Becki brought in enough special yummy food to last me Forever. Purrs, Becki!


My Monday wasn't ruined until one of the Assistant Assistant Bosses came back from lunch. She came Upstairs with a Purple Collar with a Jingle Bell attached. She came in my office, where I was enjoying an afternoon nap, and presented the contraption for me to sniff at. I sniffed it and told her I did not like it. (I knew it was a Collar, even though she acted like it was a toy.) So what does she do? Does she say, "Oh, I'm sorry Tober. Let me get this thing out of your sight. We'll throw it away." NO. She puts it on my neck! She tells me I'm handsome! (As if I don't already know this.) I got up, and it jingled!

I ran through the Library, and it jingled! I ran under Linda White's desk, and it jingled after me! I ran under Linda Porter's desk, and it followed me there, too! I ran back to my office. . . still jingling! Finally the Assistant Assistant Boss scooped me up--but not to comfort me and remove the awful thing. No! She was giggling, and she showed me to other people, and they giggled too!

Here I am under a desk being The Unhappiest Cat in the World:


In case you haven't guessed it, the Awful Person who did this to me was Christine. Watch out for that one.

Karen hugged me and told me how grumpy I looked (she used the term "vet ears" to describe the laid-back position of my ears), but she was laughing too. She showed me to some Nice Library Customers, who I thought might take sympathy on me. You know what they did? They called me Pretty.

I wasn't Pretty, I was Mad! I'm a Boy-Cat, for crying out loud!

I was so Mad that I protested by sitting in my Toilet Box. And that Awful Person Christine took pictures of me, while everyone else stood around saying "Poor Tober" and laughing at me!


I was worried for a long time. The Library Staff people kept trying to reason with me, telling me I looked handsome (not pretty), and that they already jingle (keys), so I should jingle too. I said, "No. This thing is Stupid, and I am Mad, so take it off of me Please!" Christine and Linda said they would not take it off, and so did Karen.

Linda tried to hug and comfort me, and I wouldn't have it.

Here's the thing. As my second-in-command, my Assistant Boss Karen is very receptive to my needs. We share an office. She took me back to the office and had to look at me, and she could plainly see the misery on my scrunched-up face. She tried giving me Treats (didn't want any) and pettings (didn't want any of those, either). I was determined to Never Move Again. I would go on a Hunger Strike, and get skinny, and never purr, or meow, or go anywhere ever again.

Karen finally broke down and took off the Stupid Collar. (I knew she would.) I told her we should fire Christine, too, but apparently Christine does do some kind of work at the Library (other than find new ways to torment me).

This was my second (and hopefully last) encounter with a Collar.

Free at last,

Tober

How I am Famous

Here is the blog post that I promised to you last week.

I was Googling myself one evening. (I thought it would be an easy way to bring up my blog page, since my page is, in fact, Googlable.) I was shocked when my search results included links to other pages about Tober the Library Cat (me). I clicked the links, and here's what I found.

The first one:


It is very small, but you can see this informative and important blog posting at World Wide Whiskers. If you want to stay on my page--which you probably do--you can also click on the picture to make it bigger.

Here are the highlights.

Dewey isn’t the only library cat anymore. Meet Tober. Unlike Dewey, who was merely the subject of a book, Tober, the library cat of Thorntown, Indiana, has his own blog.

This very wise blogging person chose to include a very handsome shot of me. This happened to be posted on Christmas; I didn't ask to be famous for Christmas, but this does make it easier for me to forgive Santa for not bringing my hamster. Maybe this is what he meant by surprises!

This next blogger mentions one of my better-known (and least-loved) habits:


This is posted on a blog called Men and Cats. Apparently, I am not the only cat who likes to chew on cords. The people who comment on this post seem to think that there are many good ways to keep cats from chewing cords. Lucky for me, the staff at the Library hasn't found one yet!

Now you know how I am becoming Famous.

For those of you who have suffered sleepless nights about the state of my poor hurt foot, let me reassure you that I have been well taken care of. Assistant Assistant Boss Christine noticed that my foot was really stinky, Assistant Assistant Boss Linda noticed that my foot was really puffy, and Assistant Boss Karen called the nice people at the Thorntown Veterinary Clinic. Again. This time I had to ride in the stupid pet box. Hugging with a nice view is preferred, for future reference. The doctor discovered that I had an infected toe, and it was decided that I should take Medicine.

This Medicine is NOT a pill, but it is still not very good. Rather than take the Medicine when I want to, my staff people have decided that I need to take it once a day and first thing in the morning.

When Karen gives me the Medicine, she very kindly provides tasty food and treats, so that I may quickly get the awful taste out of my mouth. Christine didn't know this routine, so after she practically sat on me and forced a syringe in my mouth, I had to run through the Library, wipe my face, hide under Linda's desk (in case Christine wasn't done), and then proceed to my breakfast bowl. Which hadn't been filled yet.

I think Assistant Boss Karen needs to sign *certain people* up for more staff training time.

While my foot was hurting, I spent a lot of time in Karen's office helping her do a Very Very Important Library Report. The staff thinks that the report bored me, but NO! What happened was this: I was such a Very Big Help and such a Hard Worker that I passed out from exhaustion, right there on the paperwork. Just ask Karen.


My foot is feeling better though, and I ran around a lot today. I also received a Present from Helen. Helen very kindly crafted one of my previously chewed cords into a toy. Then she decided it was too big, so she needed to do something a little different with it. She took it home with her so that she could fix it for me! Now that's dedication! I think Helen should be Assistant Assistant Boss of the Month!

Now I must go back to cleaning my foot and plotting my evasive maneuvers for tomorrow morning.

Wish me luck!

Tober

Imprisonment.

On Tuesday evening I startled Assistant Assistant Boss Chris Hawkins, who was working in her office. I did not mean to scare her, but I wanted to make sure that she was working back there (she was). I meowed a big Meow, and I guess she wasn't expecting me, so I scared her a bit. I was just trying to do my supervisory duties, but Assistant Assistant Boss Chris called Assistant Assistant Boss Christine and asked her to retrieve me.

So Christine came and got me, and locked me in the Processing Office. Can you believe it?

What's worse is that she took pictures of me! And she was smiling about it!

Here I am saying

Let me out of here!

Here I am saying

How dare you?

Here I am saying

You are demoted to Litterbox Scooper!

I need to train my nighttime coworkers to understand that at 6:00 pm, I expect full access to library nooks and crannies. It is very hard for me to do my job when I am cooped up in an office. One of the customers even commented on my captivity; perhaps they will rally around me and insist that the Boss should not be locked up.

I gave AAB Christine a stern talking to, but it probably won't help. This morning she tackled me to keep me from going downstairs. Some humans are very hard to train.

Aside from my coworkers having the notion that they can decide where I should be stationed at any given time, I am having a nice week. I have polished off one can of treats, and am working on two other packages at the same time! The food here is excellent!

Meows & Purrs,

Tober